Have you ever had an object that you may have obtained in some manner either given or self-purchased, that you almost wanted to break, just so you can get some new stuff?

But then you kinda think about the object and the memory you attach to it – the reason you bought it; the amount of times you used it or when or some odd off story about. And so you remember why you got it then and how you feel about it now. So, that makes you want to refrain from intentionally destroying it. Sentimentality, if you will.

And you have that conundrum in your mind for a moment.

But that’s what my bad habit consists of. For the Harry Potter fans, i got this one…but its’ like Lord Voldemort, and how he wants to live forever and so he puts part of his soul in various objects or whatnot.(See: horcrux) And there’s a history of that and so someone is remembered. And that is why I feel the need to hold on to these objects sometimes. It’s like associated with a memory of someone, so it’s like for that instant they live again for a moment. And it’s nice in a sense.

But I have to give these things up a bit. Cause a person cannot be smothered by their memories. If memories equal stuff, that’s a lot of stuff

It’s like in that movie, “Push” with the smellers or the feelers, who can see the memory of things by either scent or touch, as demonstrated in the scene, when they shot from the angle of the cup in the main character’s apartment. Every object has a history.

But I live in memories sometimes…

* – the title is funny to me, because that is the memory that I keep with my watch that I now wear on my wrist. I didn’t quite say that but I meant to.

The memory: I was in Vegas, and I was playing poker. And I had my watch was on, because I’ve decided a watch would make me look more sophisticated and adult-like. (I had come to this idea of sophistication because of clothing magazines or whatnot. The male model is in a suit and wearing a suave watch, with well-coifed hair, and shiny non-sneaker shoes. I figured I might as well start small, so I got a shiny metal watch.)

A girl at the poker table inquired about my watch, with a simple question of “What kind of watch is that?” I had to tell her it was called “a relic” much to my chagrin. I forget what she said afterwards, as I folded my hand and wished she’d stop talking to me cause I couldn’t concentrate on the game.

So this memory tells me that I am correct in that the notion to wear a watch to look more sophisticated and adult-like had worked. And when I think about the memories that passed that first one, I realize I did appear adult-like in that I haven’t been carded for alcohol bought at the store. haha. but also, in thinking about the poker memory I realize that the girl decided not to open the conversation with “What are you a japan-neez? or a KOR-eee-an?” but instead inquired about the shiny watch. (even though I think her next few questions/statement did ask me about my ethnicity I think). Regardless, score one for the first question in a conversation to not involve ethnic background or religious beliefs (e.g., “I wish I was buddha-ist, then my ass would be a lot skinnier… haha what do you guys like fast for like 30 days or something right? Gandhi right?”).